3 Things You Can Do Right Now to Get Kids to Listen

Getting kids to listen is one of the most frustrating and difficult challenges parents face. Often parents give up or approach it in the wrong way. If you want your child to pay attention and listen to you, here are three important things you can start doing right away.

1.Talk to your kids face-to-face

When you talk to your child, look at him—don’t yell from the kitchen. Walk into his room, shut off the TV and talk to him face-to-face. And be sure to tell him that this is a new communication rule in your house. You can say, “Hey Jason, I wanted to let you know that from now on when we need to talk about something, I'm going to ask you to come downstairs so we can talk face-to-face instead of yelling. And I'm going to shut off the TV, music, or other electronics, so that neither of us will be distracted and we can really listen to each other.” It’s important to note that face-to-face doesn’t mean eye-to-eye. Don’t get caught in a "look at me" power struggle with your child.

2. Don’t wear your emotions on your sleeve

There are studies that show that children get up to 70 percent of your meaning from the look on your face. So when you talk to your child, be sure to have a positive, calm look, no matter how upset you are. Kids get agitated during emotional discussions, and if your anger and annoyance show on your face, they will immediately shut down and not listen to a word you say. Practice wearing an expression that does not look angry or frustrated, even when you’re talking to your child about something really difficult or upsetting.

3. Give your kids structure

When there’s no structure in place in a home, parents often resort to yelling to get their kids to listen and comply. Without set rules and expectations, each day is different—and is based on what the parent wants (or allows) the child to do. The child’s requests often become personalized, which leads to frustration, yelling and power struggles.

When you establish structure in your home, you immediately have a way of de-personalizing requests from your kids. Set up a daily schedule that’s posted in a central location in your home. Then, you can simply point to it and say to your child in a direct, matter-of-fact way, “4 p.m.—time to stop playing video games and do your homework. If you don’t, there will be consequences.” And let him know he’ll be rewarded if he is able to meet his responsibilities consistently.

When kids have structure, they are far less likely to challenge every request you make. They may still moan and groan, but the focus will be taken off of you and placed on the structure you’ve set up.
By: James Lehman, MSW


3 Reasons Why You Can't Pass Up Learning Positive Parenting Tips!

If you have not used positive parenting tips to improve your relationship with your children, by the time you are done reading this article, you will definitely want to know how to. If you are not ready to make some wonderful changes to your life, then please come back and read when you are!

Reason #1: Do you yell and scream at your children when they just do not listen to word one of what you have to say? Surely any parent would! As we all know, this doesn't work for very long. It is usually only a matter of time before they start acting up all over again!

Reason #2: These typical harsh methods of parenting that you use when you come down hard on your children don't work, as you know. Here's the reasons they don't work and some very negative consequences!:

1. Fear and stress, because of the hard line parenting, is then increased. The rise in stress causes cortisol to be made, which then goes to the brain. The result is that your kids become mentally confused, and they then act out defiantly, just like you've witnessed many, many times!

2. Your children will be likely to have low self worth, and they will likely be prone to violence or exhibit other negative behaviors.

3. Repeated exposure to the cortisol, can cause delinquency due to deeply rooted behavioral problems!

If you want your child's brain to grow free from exposure to cortisol, you can learn positive parenting tips so you can learn how to relate to your children in a better way!

Reason #3: What is often lost in the craziness of everyday life, and all the bickering among your family, is hope that things can actually be better. Can you imagine your children doing what you ask just because it's the right thing to do?

Are you tired of the ever present bickering between you and your kids? If you are, and you would like to see how positive parenting tips can improve your life, then...
By: Paul R Donahue


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